24 Rules For Women On A First Date With A Man

1. Never wear a dress. Knees make men crazy. You don’t want to start a frenzy.
2. Never wear makeup. Best to keep expectations low in case you never wear it again.
3. Don’t shower. You want him to smell your pheromones.
4. Don’t ask him on a second date. Don’t ask about his family. Don’t ask any questions. Don’t talk.
5. Don’t order food either. Fuel your hanger. You might need it if another woman looks at your date or if he turns out to be a serial killer or a car blocks the crosswalk.
6. Don’t wear high heels. What if he’s short? Don’t not wear high heels either. What if he’s tall? Go barefoot. Be prepared to cut off your feet.